


The Curveball

by Siss007



Category: Gilmore Girls
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-13
Updated: 2018-01-13
Packaged: 2019-02-22 04:24:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13159209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Siss007/pseuds/Siss007
Summary: Rory get's her life together after finding out she's pregnant...or so she thinks.





	1. Man in a Hole

**Author's Note:**

> A/n I have had this idea since The Revival, but honestly, haven't had the nerve to write it (you'll see why). I have no idea how this is going to work out. I have the basic plot in my head. This story has no ship, and at this point, I still don't know if it even needs a ship. Logan and Jess will have roles. As always, reviews are coffee to the soul.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A/n I have had this idea since The Revival, but honestly, haven't had the nerve to write it (you'll see why). I have no idea how this is going to work out. I have the basic plot in my head. This story has no ship or if it even needs a ship, Logan and Jess will have roles. So just enjoy. I'm still working on The Ties that Bind and I might possible rewrite Something Worth Fighting For. Some of it I love and some of it I hate. Anyway, enjoy this one. As always, reviews are coffee to the soul.

Upon the stick turning pink, Rory went into planning mode. Telling her mom was the hardest; but afterward, her mother held her and wiped her tears and assured her things would work out. A baby wasn't the end-it was, in fact, a beginning of something new. After getting over the shock, Lorelai assured Rory she would be a wonderful mother.

Rory asked her mom not to tell anyone. She wanted to get through the first trimester. To which Lorelai agreed.

"You tell people in your own time and in your own way," Lorelai put her arm around Rory.

"Except Luke," Rory insisted. "You should tell your husband."

Next, she told Logan. There had mostly been silence and a promise of support, but the support part wasn't something they would have to deal with at this moment, they had nine months. Logan assured her she had not ruined everything for him. The dynastic plan wasn't going anywhere. He confessed to her that Odette had a few affairs of her own. They had agreed they would end when they were married.

It should have bothered Rory that he was so cavalier about the affairs of the woman he was supposedly going to commit the rest of his life to, but it wasn't something she was willing to give time to be angry over. She had things she had to figure out that was bigger than the drama that was Logan Huntzberger.

Then Henry Buzfuz from the Woodbridge Times retired. His position as editor paid, so Rory applied for the job and got it. When she tried to give her notice to Taylor, he flat out refused it and Rory said she needed to be paid. After holding a town meeting to vote on bringing the matter to the town elders, who then voted and agreed on her salary. Rory threw in that she wanted to hire her own staff. Which the town elders agreed to because Charlie and Esther were both retiring and getting married to each other.

Rory hired an assistant and had a job working at the Stars Hollow Gazette making actual money. So she was back, after months of denying that she was back, she was officially moved back. But unlike the thirty-something gang, she had a job. It wasn't The New York Times, but she could support her child and that was more important.

When Sookie and Jackson put their house up for rent, Rory called Sookie while standing in front of her house and moved in the next day as the tenant of her mother's best friend.

Her time to be rootless was over.

She also was starting to have second thoughts about Headmaster Charleston's offer to teach at Chilton. People would always need teachers. She had a bachelor's degree in English and was looking seriously into a program at the nearest University of Connecticut campus. She also requested a meeting with Headmaster Charleston to see if he meant what he said. By the time she had her teaching credential, her child would be around two. But there was more to it than just the steady job, she liked the idea of being back in an academic world. She saw the look on those kids faces when she visited Chilton, they were hooked, and it wasn't a horrible feeling for Rory to cause that kind of interest.

Lorelai went with her to the first sonogram. She saw the amnio sack and heard the baby's heartbeat.

"It's a strong heartbeat," the doctor commented. Her due date was in June making her just over eight weeks. The doctor recommended a regimen of prenatal vitamins and cutting back her carb intake. "But eight ounces of coffee is okay," the doctor assured Rory. "And if you feel you need more than try to mix decaf and regular."

Walking out of the doctor's office, Rory had the overwhelming feeling that this was real and It was really happening to her. Single motherhood would be hard, but her mother did it with flair and style, how could she not do the same?

The babies heartbeat inspired her, even more, to continue writing her book. She needed to have a nest egg for her and her baby. So she contacted Jess to help her with the editing. He turned her down.

"This was your idea," she said in the voice she only used when she was on the verge of a freak-out.

"I know," he agreed. "That's exactly why I shouldn't be a part of this project, I'm way too close to it.."

She sighed, "you are," she agreed. "You're in it."

"Just a chapter, I'm sure."

"You're in more than just a chapter, and the one you're in the most is an important one, it brings the whole thing together," she paused for a moment. "I decided not to make it a memoir, I think it should be just based on me and my mom, but not necessarily  _be_ me and my mom. There are some things that I don't think the world should be privy to."

"I can't wait to read it. I want the first signed copy." He paused for a moment. "I'm not going to leave you just wondering where to begin. You need an editor and I know a few. I could introduce you. Maybe see if I can help out with a few meetings with agents."

"Thank you, Jess," she said, her eyes brimming with her pregnancy hormones. "I couldn't do this without you," she could barely choke out.

"Yes, you could. You are Rory Gilmore, and I don't want to hear that ' _you could'a been a contender_ ' or being lost. Ruts happen, and you make your way out of them."

"Yeah, they do. But usually, I don't make my way out of them without you."

"A man falls in a hole and is stuck," Jess starts. "A psychologist walks by and sees the man has fallen in the hole and he gives the man some pills and then walks away. Then the man sees an old friend who jumps into the hole with him. The man looks at his friend and says, 'What are you doing here? Now we are both stuck without a way to get out.' The friend looks at the man and says, "Yeah, but I've fallen in this hole before. I know the way out."

Rory laughed, trying not to let the weariness in her voice leak through the phone line, "Thank you, Jess."

"I have to be in Manhattan in a few weeks and I'll try and set up meetings."

"I'll have a few more chapters by then."

"Okay," he said.

They hung up the phone, Rory sat with her head in her hands in her new house. She could do this.


	2. Pregnancy dreams

"So I'm having these weird pregnancy dreams," Rory told her mom when she returned from her Honeymoon with Luke, just before Thanksgiving.

Luke was putting together a bookshelf while Lorelai and Rory sat at her kitchen table. Rory was drinking English breakfast tea and eating saltine crackers, the only thing she could eat at the moment.

"I keep having this dream about a baby version of me. I mean it looks like me wrapped in a baby blanket. It's disturbing on so many levels. Maybe I'm having a girl."

"I doubt it," Lorelai answered. "I had dreams about a little boy when I was pregnant with you. I also had dreams about a beached whale and that I gave birth to a frog."

Rory laughed. She tried to ignore her stomach turning. She didn't have the nerve to tell her mom about the other dream she'd been having. The one about the baby marked with a big red A on its forehead. But she did always have a dream about a little girl, with her eyes and Logan's blonde hair.

"They're supposed to be weird."

"I have so much to do and only nine months to be prepared," Rory sighed, eyeing the large study guide she had sitting at her table for the PRAXIS exam she needed to take to get into the Masters.

"But you don't have to do it all in the first month."

"I know," Rory sighed. "I just have a lot to do before school starts in May. I have to get into the program."

Lorelai swallowed her cup of coffee, "the baby is due in June and you're going to start a masters degree."

"The Master's program starts in May and ends in June of the next year. So I'll just have one year of absolute craziness…"

"You would have that anyway with an infant."

"I know, but mom, at the end of this I'm going to have the credentials to teach at Chilton, and that comes with a salary and benefits and retirement."

"This is what you want? To teach at Chilton?" Lorelai asked.

"It's what I want," Rory paused for a moment. "Headmaster Charleston is retiring. You will never guess who is taking his spot."

"Paris Geller?" Lorelai answered.

"Uh, no. I'm pretty sure with all the degrees she has none of the of them include a teaching credential."

"Who was that kid that a crush on you and made Dean Crazy? Tritain?"

"Tristan Dugray? No, he isn't the new headmaster."

"The kid that sang at your graduation?"

"Brad? Nope, Max is the new headmaster."

"Medina?"

"Yep."

"How...how is he doing?"

"He married a science teacher and has two kids."

"Wow," Lorelai let out a sigh. "I'm glad he's doing well. He was always your now he's going to be your boss?"

"Yep, he encouraged me to do some substitute teaching at Chilton. He said that as soon as I take the Praxis tests I can be a sub."

"Really?" Lorelai questioned. "What about the Stars Hollow Gazette? You had to force the vote to get the town elders to consider paying you. How are you going to have the time for all this substitute teaching and getting a Masters degree?"

"Well, I just hired another assistant. Lana, the girl I hired first is amazing and can already do my job. By the time I start school, she will be trained to take over my job. When I'm ready to graduate, I will walk away from the Gazette."

Rory's phone beeped, with a missed call from Jess, "Hang on," Rory said to her mom, "I need to listen to this message."

_"Hey Rory, it's Jess, so I was able to get you a meeting with a literary agent I've known for awhile. He's going to be in town the first weekend in December. Also, I have to go to a book launch party in Manhattan that weekend, there are going to be a ton of literary types. I was hoping you'd come with me, maybe you could make some connections from there as well. I have reservations for Emily in the West Village. It's supposedly a trendy place. Let me know if you need a place to stay."_

"What was that all about?" Lorelai asked.

"Oh Jess," she explained what he had told her about being too close to her book, but still wanted to help her.

"Rory, you're doing too much. I think you really need to take a step back and reconsider. You could put getting your Master's degree on hold for a year. Write your book, work at the Stars Hollow Gazette and substitute teach at Chilton before you get a Master's degree. You're going to cram so much into nine months."

"Mom, I have to do this," Rory defended. "I am in no way prepared to raise a baby. But I have nine months."

"I know, and I want to be there for you. Will you at least consider putting your Masters off for a year? You are going to have some much."

Rory sighed, "I will consider it," she agreed.

* * *

"Logan," Rory answered the phone. "It's two in the morning in London."

"We needed to talk, I couldn't sleep."

"Oh," Rory yawned.

"I told Odette about the..."

"Oh...and…is she…?"

"And we talked, well she talked actually. Which is why I'm calling you in the middle of the night."

Rory closed her eyes and braced for bad news.

"I would like a legal agreement in place before the baby is born. I have to tell my father and...I just don't want to drag you into a legal battle."

"What kind of agreement and what does your father have to do with this?"

"He or she will be an heir to the Huntzberger fortune and my father's lawyers will want to protect that. So to keep my father from siccing lawyers on you, I want to take preemptive measures. I want to tell him we already have an agreement."

"Do I need to get a lawyer?"

"You should go talk to one, I'll pay your legal fee's."

"Logan, you don't have to do that."

"I want to Ace. I know my father, this is to protect you. I've seen these things get ugly. Odette pointed out.."

"...This was Odette's idea?" Rory's stomach did a backflip and she grabbed her saltine crackers.

"She brought it up."

"So what kind of agreement?" Rory relented.

"I never want you to worry about the child's basic needs."

"I'm not worried about his or her basic needs because I am taking care of those."

"I know you are Ace, but if something should come up, money isn't a reason for this child to not have what it needs."

"I know it isn't and it won't be because he or she will be taken care of," Rory paused. "How is she okay with this?"

"Our relationship is open completely..." Logan waited a moment to let his statement sink in, "though it won't be after we marry. That wasn't...just a whim." He took a deep breath."Both of us had fathers who... never settled on just one woman, shall we say. Her father was a married man, but... her mother was his mistress."

Rory's "Oh..." was inaudible.

"She was very well cared for. And she is...very grateful for that. So..." he trailed off.

"She believes other children deserve the same?"

"Yeah." There was a sadness to Logan's voice. "I really wanted to give...any kid of mine better than that, but..." he got quiet for a second, "life has a funny way of folding back on itself no matter what."

"I told you the door is open for you to walk through."

"And that door should include visitation."

"Of course."

"And we make major decisions together."

"Agreed, as long as it's you and I making them together."

"Fair," he paused. "You and I are forever linked and I want things to be easy, simple and best for the child. We need to decide what is best, never what some judge decides."

"I don't want to put a child through that."

"So, I will talk to a lawyer, you do the same, and we will have an agreement before the baby is born."

"That works," she paused. "Logan?" she asked. "Do you...do you want a sonogram picture?"

Logan's smile was nearly audible."Yes, send me a picture. When is the due date?"

"June 18th."

"I'll be there."

* * *

Later that night, Rory woke with a start, immediately putting a hand on her stomach. She'd had a dream, a very clear dream. Her grandfather was there in his study, holding a baby, a perfect little boy with bright blue eyes and blonde hair, calling him Richard Logan Gilmore.

A tear escaped her eye.


	3. Chilton's Headmaster

Upon the stick turning pink, Rory went into planning mode. Telling her mom was the hardest; but afterward, her mother held her and wiped her tears and assured her things would work out. A baby wasn't the end-it was, in fact, a beginning of something new. After getting over the shock, Lorelai assured Rory she would be a wonderful mother.

Rory asked her mom not to tell anyone. She wanted to get through the first trimester. To which Lorelai agreed.

"You tell people in your own time and in your own way," Lorelai put her arm around Rory.

"Except Luke," Rory insisted. "You should tell your husband."

Next, she told Logan. There had mostly been silence and a promise of support, but the support part wasn't something they would have to deal with at this moment, they had nine months. Logan assured her she had not ruined everything for him. The dynastic plan wasn't going anywhere. He confessed to her that Odette had a few affairs of her own. They had agreed they would end when they were married.

It should have bothered Rory that he was so cavalier about the affairs of the woman he was supposedly going to commit the rest of his life to, but it wasn't something she was willing to give time to be angry over. She had things she had to figure out that was bigger than the drama that was Logan Huntzberger.

Then Henry Buzfuz from the Woodbridge Times retired. His position as editor paid, so Rory applied for the job and got it. When she tried to give her notice to Taylor, he flat out refused it and Rory said she needed to be paid. After holding a town meeting to vote on bringing the matter to the town elders, who then voted and agreed on her salary. Rory threw in that she wanted to hire her own staff. Which the town elders agreed to because Charlie and Esther were both retiring and getting married to each other.

Rory hired an assistant and had a job working at the Stars Hollow Gazette making actual money. So she was back, after months of denying that she was back, she was officially moved back. But unlike the thirty-something gang, she had a job. It wasn't The New York Times, but she could support her child and that was more important.

When Sookie and Jackson put their house up for rent, Rory called Sookie while standing in front of her house and moved in the next day as the tenant of her mother's best friend.

Her time to be rootless was over.

She also was starting to have second thoughts about Headmaster Charleston's offer to teach at Chilton. People would always need teachers. She had a bachelor's degree in English and was looking seriously into a program at the nearest University of Connecticut campus. She also requested a meeting with Headmaster Charleston to see if he meant what he said. By the time she had her teaching credential, her child would be around two. But there was more to it than just the steady job, she liked the idea of being back in an academic world. She saw the look on those kids faces when she visited Chilton, they were hooked, and it wasn't a horrible feeling for Rory to cause that kind of interest.

Lorelai went with her to the first sonogram. She saw the amnio sack and heard the baby's heartbeat.

"It's a strong heartbeat," the doctor commented. Her due date was in June making her just over eight weeks. The doctor recommended a regimen of prenatal vitamins and cutting back her carb intake. "But eight ounces of coffee is okay," the doctor assured Rory. "And if you feel you need more than try to mix decaf and regular."

Walking out of the doctor's office, Rory had the overwhelming feeling that this was real and It was really happening to her. Single motherhood would be hard, but her mother did it with flair and style, how could she not do the same?

The babies heartbeat inspired her, even more, to continue writing her book. She needed to have a nest egg for her and her baby. So she contacted Jess to help her with the editing. He turned her down.

"This was your idea," she said in the voice she only used when she was on the verge of a freak-out.

"I know," he agreed. "That's exactly why I shouldn't be a part of this project, I'm way too close to it.."

She sighed, "you are," she agreed. "You're in it."

"Just a chapter, I'm sure."

"You're in more than just a chapter, and the one you're in the most is an important one, it brings the whole thing together," she paused for a moment. "I decided not to make it a memoir, I think it should be just based on me and my mom, but not necessarily be me and my mom. There are some things that I don't think the world should be privy to."

"I can't wait to read it. I want the first signed copy." He paused for a moment. "I'm not going to leave you just wondering where to begin. You need an editor and I know a few. I could introduce you. Maybe see if I can help out with a few meetings with agents."

"Thank you, Jess," she said, her eyes brimming with her pregnancy hormones. "I couldn't do this without you," she could barely choke out.

"Yes, you could. You are Rory Gilmore, and I don't want to hear that 'you could'a been a contender' or being lost. Ruts happen, and you make your way out of them."

"Yeah, they do. But usually, I don't make my way out of them without you."

"A man falls in a hole and is stuck," Jess starts. "A psychologist walks by and sees the man has fallen in the hole and he gives the man some pills and then walks away. Then the man sees an old friend who jumps into the hole with him. The man looks at his friend and says, 'What are you doing here? Now we are both stuck without a way to get out.' The friend looks at the man and says, "Yeah, but I've fallen in this hole before. I know the way out."

Rory laughed, trying not to let the weariness in her voice leak through the phone line, "Thank you, Jess."

"I have to be in Manhattan in a few weeks and I'll try and set up meetings."

"I'll have a few more chapters by then."

"Okay," he said.

They hung up the phone, Rory sat with her head in her hands in her new house. She could do this.


	4. Drinking for two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: See bottom. Spoiler in the trigger warning. Otherwise, proceed with caution.

_...the fine line that we all constantly dance between joy and pain, between absolute happiness and absolute heartbreak. ~Charles Hazlewood_

"So things are good?" Rory's obstetrician, Doctor Patel asked. She had been recommended by Paris. Rory hadn't told Paris yet, she had just told her she needed a new OBGYN.

"Yeah," Rory answered, "other than the morning sickness."

"You are twelve weeks today, so you should be tapering off that a little. Most women do, not all, but most."

"That's a relief. From my research, I've been seeing that it's possible to know if it's a boy or a girl anywhere from 12 to 20 weeks, depending on the how advanced the ultrasound technology is. So… does that mean today, or…?"

"I'm afraid we're still slightly behind the curve; so, while there's a possibility we'll get a peek, at this point it's still pretty hard to tell. We'll do another ultrasound around eighteen weeks. That should be pretty definitive."

"Oh," Rory nodded, disappointed.

Lorelai started bouncing in her seat. "But we still might get to see some-thiiiiiiiing!" she grinned, almost singing the words. Her double fisted coffee was beginning to show. Early on in the pregnancy, Lorelai declared she was "drinking for two," which, by means of a sly cup-swap, served as a handy way for Rory to hide her non-caffeinated status. Though, by the same token, when Luke caught on and filled the second mug, just as covertly with decaf, there wasn't much she could do but scowl. When she and Rory were out and about, however, she had still made her joke a tradition, effectively doubling her caffeine intake on those trips. "Can I see my grandbaby again now, pleeeease?"

"Of course you can, Grandma," Dr. Patel smiled at Lorelai. She leaned Rory back in her seat and put clear jelly on her stomach.

"Oh..." Lorelai winced. "That grandma name isn't gonna work. It's sweet of you, but I'm going to be something other than grandma."

"Granny?" Rory suggested.

The doctor smiled, "I called my grandma 'Nana'."

"I like 'Nana'," Lorelai acknowledged. "But a Nana is a cookie baking, knitting grandma. I'm not going to be a cooking or baking, knitting grandma. Not that there's anything wrong with cookie baking, knitting grandma's—I love eating the cookies, and I do knit occasionally. I just want more flair." An expressive wave of her hand accompanied the word as if it held a brilliant, fluttering scarf.

"Well, what kind of grandma are you going to be?" Rory asked.

"I'm going to spoil this baby rotten," she declared. "I'm going to give 'cool grandma' new meaning. I want to be a cross between a fairy godmother and Queen Clarisse from the Princess Diaries."

Rory rolled her eyes. "Here we go."

"I'm sure you will make a wonderful grandmother," Dr. Patel added, placatingly as she moved the monitor over Rory's stomach. Suddenly, the room was filled with the fluttering and whooshing that was the stuff of magic.

"It doesn't get old," Lorelai's eyes filled with tears.

"No, it doesn't," Rory agreed, peering down with a wonderstruck smile at the blooming swell that she could still disguise, but that she'd begun unconsciously finding her hand coming to rest upon with an unfamiliar contentment.

Dr. Patel removed the stick from Rory's stomach, "You know," Dr. Patel said before she left, "I had a patient who called her grandma Lola, they told me it was a traditional Filipino name for grandmother."

"I could be Lola..." Lorelai mused, testing the sound of it while she watched the grainy image of the preciousness that was producing the magic flutter.

"I also had a patient who was raised by her grandparents. She called them Lolly and Pop."

Rory's eyes got big. "Ohhhhhh… I want you and Luke to be Lolly and Pop…" she cooed.

Lorelai put a hand to her heart. "Ugh," she uttered with a lump in her throat. "Even though Luke's head will explode…through his hat... he is the Pop to my Lolly—case closed."

"Glad to have helped you come to a decision," Dr. Patel said, wiping the gel from the monitor. "But, this baby is lucky to have you, no matter what he or she calls you." She smiled the sort of a smile you would expect a good doctor to smile at you—warm, but closed lipped and somehow neutral. Preparing to leave the room, she looked back, instructing, "And, Rory—make an appointment for another four weeks, and we will schedule you then for another ultrasound to find out the sex of the baby."

"Thank you, Dr. Patel."

"So, can I take you to lunch?" Lorelai asked Rory when she was dressed.

"We can go pick out your Lolly wand afterward."

Lorelai gasped. "Dirty!"

"Oh, I should've seen that one coming," Rory groaned, grabbing her purse.

"Yes, you should have. Wait!" Lorelai exhaled in wonderment. "I get a Lolly wand!"

"I thought Lolly wand—dirty."

Lorelai waved this away with one hand, continuing. "Oh! It will look like Glinda's, all glowy and golden, but with sparkles; and it has to be made of butterscotch candy, so it can be a real Lolli-wand!"

"And 'you can welcome them to munch-kin land'," Rory finished, singing, and with only a hint of teasing sarcasm.

Lorelai took the singing cue, even though Rory had swept her a gesture, opening the door at the end of her own verse, and ushering her through it. "Come out, come out, wherever you are, and meet the young lady who fell from a star…"

There were actually relatively few times her mother made Rory blush in public, but as various members of the office staff looked up with mystified and slightly frightened expressions, this became one of them.

"She fell from the sky, she fell very far, and Kansas she says is the name of the star."

Rory was about to utter a groan when, from the lobby, a decidedly munchkinified voice echoed, "Kansas she says is the name of the star," at which Lorelai shot her a look, and they both lost it.

* * *

When Rory woke up on Saturday, she felt odd…or was it normal? Her nausea never set in. Instead, she was hungry and ate a full breakfast. When Dr. Patel had said her morning sickness might begin to taper off, she'd certainly expected something more gradual. Not that she was complaining.

With her expected debating whether to hover over a toilet bowl time unexpectedly freed up, she packed a bag and left for the city. She wasn't meeting Jess until later but wanted to take advantage of the time to go over the chapters she'd written once more before the meeting. She'd completed the first five chapters, was working on the sixth, and had outlines for two others.

She let herself into Paris' house and went up to the extra bedroom she usually stayed in. She was tired and closed her eyes for just a moment. When she opened her eyes next, it was with a start, Paris' children jumping on her bed.

"Wake up, Aunty Rory," they shouted.

"Hey guys," she croaked, rubbing her eyes, and glanced at the clock. "I slept for three hours," she grumbled.

"Hey, kiddos, give Aunty Rory a minute," Doyle said from the stairwell.

"Daddy, I have to tell Aunt Rory about the Zebra's," the little girl, Gabrielle said. "A group of them are called a dazzle of Zebras. And a group of Owls is called a Parliament. And...and...and a mommy birdy will pretend to have a broken wing to distract a human from her baby."

"Sorry, Rory," Doyle said coming into the room. "She went to the Zoo today," Doyle smiled.

"Yep, she sure did," Rory mumbled.

"I have one more important fact to report," the little girl piped in. "It's my favorite."

"Tell me all about it," Rory said with a stretch and sat up.

"Elephants babysit other elephants, and the more elephants that take care of the little elephant means that it will have a higher chance of survival. They mourn the death when one of them dies. And even if the herd separates, they still keep in touch," the little girl said in a rush.

"It sounds like you learned a lot," Rory said, slightly more awake now, and genuinely impressed.

"I did! It was so much fun," Gabrielle beamed.

"Gabby, sweetie, why don't you go get ready for dinner," Doyle said before the little girl could say more about what she learned at the zoo. "Paris mentioned you had a dinner meeting to go to."

"Yeah, I'm meeting my friend Jess. He's going to introduce me to a literary agent."

"Really?" Doyle asked. "What do you need an agent for?"

"I'm writing a book, it's based on me and my mom."

"Let me know how it goes. I know a few people who might be interested in workshopping the manuscript," Doyle said, and then looked at his watch. "I should get dinner ready, or get the maid started on dinner. Paris is going to be home soon, and I'm trying to prove that I can be a good husband."

"Really?" Rory questioned. "You and Paris are trying to work things out?"

"We are going to try. My deal in Hollywood fell through. I get to keep the money they gave me, but the scripts I sold aren't getting made. It really makes a man realize what's important."

"Well, I'm happy for you two. I hadn't had the chance to talk to her in depth, but she mentioned that she had news."

Doyle left Rory to get ready for her dinner meeting. As she was leaving, she overheard the little girl tell Paris about her trip to the zoo. "Mommy, Rory is from another herd, but she still comes over to babysit us, and she is mommy's best friend. Elephants have best friends too. Do you think that will impress Ms. Julie and be better information than that Sarah Montgomery? I don't want to be friends with her or her herd."

Rory smiled at Gabrielle. "She is certainly a wealth of information."

"She, fortunately, takes after me," Paris said, walking her friend to the sidewalk. "We took her there for her sharing at preschool. Which is a feeder into The Chapin Friends school."

"I expect nothing less from you," Rory said, giving a decided nod, lower lip protruding slightly. They paused for a moment. "Doyle told me you guys are trying to work things out."

"We are. I'll tell you about it over coffee tomorrow."

"Okay, that would be nice. I have news for you too...over coffee." She looked at her watch. "I need to go." As the cab stopped at the curb, she cursed herself for having slept too long. She hadn't been able to look over the chapters she'd written, polishing the fourth and fifth, as she'd intended. She sighed, hoping what she had was enough. Maybe she would just show the agent the first three chapters.

"Hey," she said, greeting Jess outside the restaurant.

"Hey, yourself," he greeted. "You ready for this?"

"As I'll ever be. Who is this guy?"

"Holden Fief. A lot of his clients are regular contributors to our 'zine. Truncheon has bought a few books from him, and they have done well. He's a good guy. I actually...count him as a friend. Not that it's a favor to a friend thing. Just—he happens to be one."

"Wow. Thank you, Jess," she said.

"Don't thank me yet, you have to meet the guy, talk to him, no guarantees."

"No, I do, regardless. I wouldn't be getting this meeting without you."

"Well, then, let's go in and have it," Jess said, ducking his head graciously, no longer rejecting the thanks completely as he once would have.

"Wait—he's waiting in there already? While we're standing out here talking!" Rory felt her pulse rate triple.

"Relax. He's compulsively dork early, just like you. But it makes him edgy when other people are. So... we chat, take the edge off your nerves… then we go in."

"Look at you and your people skills!" Rory laughed.

"Stop." Jess rolled his eyes.

"Are we not-early enough yet?" Rory asked, still smirking in a way that reminded him that her teasing remained internally.

"Has the big hand reached the ten minutes before the twelve mark?" he asked with the same sing-song in his voice.

"I'm only allowed to be ten minutes early?" she said, suddenly pouting.

Jess tipped his head to one side, looking her in the eye.

With a sigh, she consulted her cellphone. "Two more minutes."

The restaurant was small and crowded, it was dimly lit and had exposed brick on one side and full mirrors on the walls. Jess led them to a table in the back.

"Holden, this is Rory, Rory, Holden," he introduced them.

Holden stood up, shaking Rory's hand. He was in his early-thirties, had dark blue eyes, and dark hair. He was over six-foot-three. His mere presence was oddly commanding, despite the kind eyes that peered at her through horn-rimmed glasses, and the pleasant smile that put Rory at ease.

"It's nice to meet you," he said, and she was surprised at how young his voice sounded, though it had a gravel not dissimilar to Jess'. "Jess has told me a lot about you."

"Oh, he has, has he?" Her eyebrows raised lightly.

"All good stuff," Jess piped in. "I ordered you a glass of whiskey. Is that okay?'

"I...uh," she stammered before noticing the wry smile Jess had. "Whiskey is fine," she said with a dismissive laugh.

A waiter came to the table with their drinks, and they ordered loaded curly fries, a must have, according to the restaurant's website. Rory ordered an additional glass of ice water "and keep them coming," she added jokingly, hoping to discreetly avoid the whiskey, and vainly wishing that Lorelai was there "drinking for two," or Luke was tending bar and had filled her glass with nice whiskey colored apple juice. Rory scanned the menu and settled on the cheese pizza. She hoped her days of morning sickness had passed and wanted to try something with some flavor.

"So Rory," Holden started. "Jess tells me you are looking for an agent. You have a book in the works?"

"I do, I am," she answered. "I've been a freelance journalist for a while, but this is a new project for me."

"Can you tell me about it?."

"My mother was sixteen when she had me and she dedicated her life to making sure I had everything I would need to succeed. She made it possible for me to go to a private school, which paved the way for me to go to Yale."

Holden nodded his head, "She sounds amazing, but what makes this novel—the story you are telling about her, and the way you intend to tell that story special?"

"Have you read Truth and Beauty by Ann Patchett?"

His brows drew together as he nodded again.

"It was a memoir of her and her best friend. How they supported each other and saw each other through life's ups and downs. It's a celebration of true friendship among women. That's what my novel is, a story about a sixteen-year-old who gave up everything for her daughter, became her best friend in all the world, grew up in a sense with her… And, while it's the story of this one mother and her daughter, it really is a celebration of all mothers and daughters."

"I had a mom like that," Holden smiled, nodding his head, "—have, I mean," he corrected quickly, then glanced away self-conscious at the fumble. "Still have her, still lucky to—" he stopped abruptly when attempting to restore eye contact.

Rory's face clenched tight, teeth clenched and eyes clamped shut as a searing pain shot from her stomach and overtook her entire body. "Jess, something is wrong," she said, her voice low, and shallow breathing.

The week utterance of his name, the helpless tone, rather than the words snapped Jess out of deep thought.

"What?" he asked, straightening, inclined toward her with the urgency the tone commanded.

"I need…" she choked on a sob, "...you need to take me to the hospital."

"I...what? What's wrong?"

"Jess, please," Rory begged in a low voice.

"Can you stand?" Holden asked, having seamlessly switched gears.

Rory tried to get up from the table, but her legs buckled beneath her, landing her immediately back in her seat, tears rushing down her cheeks. She shook her head no. "Please," she begged, "please just get me out of here and to a doctor."

"Okay," Holden said, taking his phone out. "We're going to call an ambulance."

Jess, who had retrieved his phone and was checking hospitals, routes, and mentally calculating traffic, lowered his cell, nodding at Holden's assessment. His calculations may have been slowed slightly as he could hardly tear his eyes from Rory, taking in every line of her pained expressions and twinge of her body. Presently his eyes dropped downward and widened as he noticed a pool of blood by the chrome leg of Rory's chair, followed droplets to her right pump shoe and saw where it was dripping down Rory's ankle. His eyes caught Holden's momentarily, and he looked down at the quickly spreading blotch of blood, dead center of Rory's pants.

Holden nodded and swallowed, then stepped away from the table as the 9-1-1 operator responded.

There was a lot going on around Rory all at once, people in the seats nearest to them sprang into action to alert the waitress other staff who in turn escorted people out of the restaurant and moved tables around them so that the EMTs would have room to work when they arrived.

Rory cried out in pain and clutched onto Jess, refusing to let him go once paramedics had her on the gurney. So he had no choice but to travel with her in the ambulance.

"I'll meet you there," Holden assured him, unexpectedly. He had given Jess a ride from his hotel, but this was New York. A cab or a subway would have sufficed nearly as easily.

Though the fingers interlaced with his were white-knuckled, and her lips were trembling, once the ambulance rumbled to life, she managed to warble out, "Jess..."

"Yeah?" came his instant response, though the single word caught on his vocal cords.

"Call my mom."

*Trigger Warning: miscarriage

A/n: This chapter is what kept me from writing this story for a long time. I have done my best to treat this topic with respect. If you feel as though I haven't, please talk directly to me. I have a plan...I hope you will stick with me. Reviews are coffee to the soul.


	5. Golden Lasso

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A/N so that last chapter...that's why it took me so long to write this story, but it came to me after rewatching the revival last year. I felt like if I couldn't tell this story without great respect to the topic, then I wasn't going to do it. If you feel at any time that I'm not doing that, please send me a private message. I've had to rewatch some of the revival and I have to say, it's grown on me. Rory is going on a journey from here, but I had to put her in a dark place first. As always, reviews are coffee to the soul.

" _We need never be ashamed of our tears." ~_ _Charles Dickens_ _,_ _Great Expectations_

For a Saturday night, the diner was slow, mostly with locals. Babette and Patty occupied a table along with Kirk and Lulu. Taylor was finishing his peach pie and Tom and his wife were about to leave. Lane and Zach ate a quiet dinner while Mrs. Kim babysat the boys.

"Don't answer that," Luke grumped when Lorelai's phone rang.

"It's one of Rory's phones, probably telling me about her dinner with Jess and the agent he set her up with," she said picking up.

"Lorelai," Jess said when she picked up the phone.

"Well, hello nephew," Lorelai greeted Jess cheerfully. "What are you doing using Rory's phone?"

"Uh," Jess sputtered. "Are you...uh," he took a deep breathe, "You need to come to New York. Something...something…"

"Something what? Jess?" Lorelai interrupted, " Rory is...I'm with her in an ambulance. Something's wrong. She's on her way to the emergency room and she's bleeding. I don't know what or why. She just...she needs you to be here."

"Oh my God the baby!" Lorelai exclaimed standing up. The entire diner stopped, frozen, mouth's agape. She looked at Luke, tears forming, ignoring the roomful of people who had just found out Rory's news and headed towards the door.

Luke grabbed the phone from Lorelai "What hospital Jess?" he asked.

"Lower Manhattan Presbyterian."

"Okay," her voice shook, grabbing the phone back from Luke. "Jess, I need you to call Paris Geller. She's in Rory's phone. And just...she needs to be with Rory right now. Tell her I'm coming as fast as Luke can drive."

"Go," Zack said. "We'll close up." Luke gave Zack the keys and left with Lorelai.

"Lorelai," Lane said. "I want to come."

She nodded her head, unable to talk and the three moved hastily towards Luke truck.

* * *

In the emergency room, the nurses poked and prodded Rory. They drew blood, gave her pain meds and asked her many questions. She still wouldn't let go of Jess' hand. Not when the doctor did an ultrasound or when the blood test came back. She couldn't speak or look him in the eye. He just sat next to her as she clutched onto him. Jess was replaced by a nurse when they did the pelvic exam but quickly reinstated to his post by Rory's side.

When the doctor finally said the words, they pierced Rory's heart. He apologized sincerely to her, then told her her options. She was barely able to follow along with all the information the doctor told her.

"I..can...can I..." she started to say.

"Have the procedure," came a familiar voice. "And save the tissue for testing," Paris demanded to the doctor. She grabbed Rory's chart and read it over. "Put a rush on her tests."

"But…" Rory started to question. "Where did you come from?"

"You're hemorrhaging blood, Rory," Paris said with a softness rarely heard from Paris Geller.

"Your mom asked me to call her," Jess jumped in.

Rory seemed please with Paris' presence, "It's safe?" she asked. "I can still have...again...if I wa-" her voice caught and tears formed.

Paris nodded, "Most do."

"Ma'am who are you?" a nurse asked. "You can't just march in here with orders."

"Her Doctor and best friend. How do you think I got in here?" Paris bit back. "Who are you? Did you get your MD? I'm so glad you went to night school at the local community college for eight years to collect samples and run labs. Get out of my way, I have privileges here. You can check the file." Paris shoved an ID in the woman's hand.

Rory nodded, "What she said."

"Take her to labor and delivery," the doctor said. He continued giving the nurse more instruction. All of which was medical gibberish to Rory.

"Your mom is coming," Jess said.

"Thank you," she said. "But stay."

"I won't leave," he promised as a nurse attempted to unlatch Rory from him. "I'll go wait for your mom and Luke."

"She'll be on the third floor," the nurse said pulling the curtain around Rory.

* * *

_A baby's laughter woke her up. She sat up in bed, she was in the room she had at her grandparent's house. Rory walked into her grandfather's study. Richard looked healthy, the way she would always remember, with a warm smile and a bow tie. He had a baby in his arms and was singing:_

_Bulldog, Bulldog, Bow wow-wow,_

_Eli Yale!_

_Rory couldn't see the babies face, but somehow she knew it was a boy. Richard held the child in a blue blanket With a big R embroidered on the side._

Rory woke with a start and slowly opened her eyes, "Rory," Lorelai said softly.

"Mom," Rory sobbed, tears leaking from her eyes. "I…" she couldn't speak.

Lorelai moved to Rory's side as she buried her head into Lorelai's chest and cried into her mom. She wasn't a thirty-two-year-old career woman or a strong, independent woman in that moment. She couldn't be those things. Instead, she was broken, completely broken.

"...Jess…" she tried to say.

"Resembled a white knight the way he took care of you," Lorelai interrupted. "He told me everything when we were in the waiting room. He's still here. The guy he was with didn't leave until Luke and I got here. " Lorelai said, unable to hold back her own tears.

Rory looked at her mom, her eyes still wet from crying, "What do I do now?"

Lorelai's own heart ached for her lost grandchild and nothing in her years as a mother would ever prepare her to hold her child as she sobbed over the loss she'd just suffered. She'd spent Rory's childhood being Wonder Woman for her daughter. She'd need to find her golden lasso and be strong enough for the both of them.

"Right now, I'm going to go call a nurse and they should let you go home in a few hours. Then we are going to Paris' house where you will rest. Lane and Luke are at her house setting up a place for you. Then I'm going to take you home."

Rory nodded into her mom's shoulder.

Lorelai held onto her daughter. "You're going to get through this."

"I have to tell Logan and Dr. Patel and..."

"You do," Lorelai shushed Rory. "and you will do all those things. But not right now. Right now, you need to take care of yourself."


End file.
